i have always

wondered why i am so callous
how i could be so detached
today i found that maybe it is because i never
really cared about anyone before
yet you made me sad today
because i cared. you made me
cry because i couldn't believe it
i worry because maybe i am like those
people you talk about that maybe
it is just fleeting and that it could
just be anyone. it is strange only
because i have always thought
that way too and sometimes i
think it about myself. i don't
want to hold you back nor
do i think that i could or would
ever will it. i just wanted to say
these things but i couldn't.
i wasn't sure if it would come
out in the right way. i feel like
maybe i shouldn't. why do we
even bother then at all?